Why visibility + content feel exhausting (and aren't driving the results you want in business)

Authenticity is a huge buzzword right now in the online space.

“BE MORE AUTHENTIC!” “JUST BE YOURSELF!!!”

But I think most people misunderstand authenticity. In fact, I think it’s common to act inauthentically than it is to be truly authentic, especially in content.

Authenticity is the alignment of your internal and external reality. The alignment of what’s going on inside of you and your outward expression.

And yet, most people never speak what’s truly going on inside of them. We say what we think other people want to hear, what we feel safe saying (because we anticipate a safe reaction) and what we think will sell our products, services or make us seem ‘authoritive’.

Performance is EXHAUSTING. And if your performing for the benefit of others each and every day and not able to express authentically, your content and business will always feel exhausting.

You will be attracting clients who aren’t actually aligned - you have to perform in every meeting. Exhausting.

You will have to pep yourself up for every post, reel and speaking engagement to your performative self. Exhausting.

You will spend your days feeling like an imposter and worried about someone ‘finding you out’. Exhausting.

You will always be seeking the next trend, hack or script to use and will be panicking about where your next step is coming from, relying on a coach or chatgpt to fix you. Exhausting.

And it truly doesn’t have to be.

Finding + expressing authentically is actually really easy (when you know how, and I am going to get you started below). It’s also exactly the cure you need for your visibility. It is the thing that will FINALLY make everything easier, faster and less all-consuming so that you can actually have a life outside of business.

I know this, because this is my journey. It’s also the journey of each and every woman that comes into my world.

I spent so many years constantly defaulting into the way that other people thought and parroted what they said. I found it so hard to understand what I truly thought, and would bend my opinion to serve the person in front of me. And then - shame. The most destructive emotion when it goes unchecked. I worried about speaking up because I didn’t want to be challenged or confronted and the perceived embarrassment was enough for me to keep my mouth shut. After discovering coaching and going through my training - it hit me like lightning. I was so afraid of being wrong, or not being liked, or feeling that shame - that I had learned how to be the wallflower. Beige. Quiet. Dull. I made that my personality. I liked what other people liked and hated what other people hated. Self leadership is not found in this place. Following the crowd like a sheep and then expecting the results I wanted to just come knocking.

No one could even see who I was. I couldn’t see who I was. To find her - I had to step away from other people’s noise, evaluate my values, ask myself the hard questions about who I was and what I wanted. Me. Not my family, friends or randoms on the internet. I had to change the way I allowed myself to show up in the world. I had to get comfy with the uncomfortable and not knowing what would happen next - and trust myself to take the next step.

Developing self trust, leadership and confidence - the things that authenticity LOVES.

You are able to actually DO MORE and make more money, impact and welcome in the most incredible opportunities - and it feels easy. Effortless. Obvious.

But it’s a journey to get there.

It takes a bit of front loading effort.

Most of what we are taught about visibility in business teaches us how to create a great reel hook, to go for the pain points and desires of our ideal client. How to focus our messaging and ‘target’ people.

But that only works if you have a strong brand foundation - and an anchor in your mission and purpose.

And yet - that’s what’s missing.

Business is tough - even more so in the online space than ever before. People are more discerning and need to trust you to even opt in to a freebie.

Authenticity is what gets through to people.

But you must first find it.

I hear from women all the time that they don’t know what to say. They don’t know what’s authentic to them and what’s conditioning.

Here’s a quick exercise to help:

Ask yourself, what’s truly in my heart to say or express that doesn’t have anything to do with proving myself, selling or getting a positive reaction?

You will feel a little tug in your heart. A flutter in your chest. It’s likely that you have these moments each and every day, but they are quickly butted away by your doubt, fear and wallflower identity that fears reaction or taking the limelight.

Those little indicators - the moment the passion rises and the excitement passes through you are your authentic voice. Listen to it.

If all fear and doubt was removed - what would you be showing up every day and saying? How would you say it?

If you released the need to be perfect - and knew that each and every time you let your authentic voice out to play - you are building the skills of confidence and authenticity?

How would it feel to know that your authenticity, like your confidence, is a journey and not a destination. But something ever changing as you grow, heal and change?

What if your authentic voice was enough - just as it was right now?

The most connective visibility (the stuff that gets sales and not just likes) is the stuff that comes straight from you. Unfiltered. Unpolished.

And you can’t create great visibility without fucking up a few times and teaching yourself that being perfect was never the goal.

Your fullest expression is.

Letting your creativity thrive is.

Everything else you experience is just a result of that. The money, clients, opportunities - they are all a result of who you decide to be in your visibility + content.

They don’t lie in the content pillars or strategy.

They are found in the alignment of your inner voice and outer expression.

This is the work that finally frees you from the need to constantly perform.

Authenticity is your ticket to freedom. So go on the journey to find it <3